In the past year I pushed hard to get a few goals. I ended up breaking through a few comfort zones at the same time. It was hard, it was uncomfortable, and it was needed. This morning I realized that it is very easy to wrap yourself back into those comfort zones. So easy, that you don't necessarily notice you are doing it until you have to break out again.
That's what happened to me this morning. I like to know what I am doing. I plan. I organize. I learn the steps. And I think ahead. Sometimes I fly by the seat of my pants, but not often. I don't think I realized to what extreme I did these things.
In taekwondo when I first learned I would teach the littles I sat down with my computer, researched, broke down the curriculum, and made up a plan from which to work from. I have definitely stepped away from the plan at times, but it gave me a base to start from.
When you are learning something new you don't have a base to start from. It's like you're free falling in midair, and may I say that is a very uncomfortable feeling for me. So, when they were working on knife defenses today I just observed. I came a little late to that time period which made it easy to observe at first, but the people I work with are great and include me. The first time I was able to get out of it by saying I was observing. The second time I wasn't given a choice.
At first all I could do is block the knife, but the gentleman I was working with had patience and kept striking. Eventually I came up with some new defenses, proved those defenses bad, and didn't end up with anything solid. BUT (and that is a very big "but") what I was able to do during that time period was break out of the comfort zone a little.
It didn't matter if people were watching. It was okay that I failed. No one cared if I laughed as I was thrown around. Those working with me wanted to help me learn, and I got to the point where it was okay that I didn't know what I was doing again.
That really was huge for me.
Sometimes we don't notice we are in our comfort zone until we have to break through it. The heart beats faster. The breath gets shallow. Anxiety grabs your soul and freezes you. And then you take a deep breath, move through, and end up on the outside of that boundary. Comfort zones aren't necessarily bad things. They only become bad when they keep you from growing. And sometimes the biggest thing you do in a day is break out of one.